Day 11: A Deceased Person I Wish I Could Talk to

I’d like to talk with Nikola Tesla, the greatest inventor that has ever set foot on American soil. No, that honor doesn’t go to Thomas Edison. Edison was great and all at inventing his own schticks, but he was even better at screwing over his bro Tesla. The lightbulb was Tesla’s business (though historians get butthurt over this contradiction, so Edison gets the fame). Tesla was the absolute, undisputed boss of electricity, even having those crazy coils being named after him. I read something once about Tesla making up this trick through some scientific sorcery that involved a sphere of electricity moving across the ground.

Let’s just get this out of the way: Tesla was the superior inventor, but Edison was the better businessman. 

I really don’t know what I’d be able to say to Tesla. I mean, he was the greatest inventor ever for a reason. If you gave him the option of having sex with any woman he wanted or tinkering all he wanted, he would have chosen tinkering. Invention was Tesla’s sex. So I mean, I wouldn’t be getting much social insight from the guy. 

I’d just be meeting him as an archiver, getting all of his invention notes and making copies. I’d then come back to the present and give those notes to people who could actually understand them. Maybe I’d have Stephen Hawking dumb it down for me in his monotonous Microsoft Sam voice.

That image cracks me up. I’ll end this before this gets too offensive. 

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6 comments on “Day 11: A Deceased Person I Wish I Could Talk to

  1. Happylifeaholic says:

    As offensive as some people might find it, the Stephen Hawking image is hilarious 🙂

  2. Valkyrie says:

    Good choice. 🙂

  3. You need to check out the post on Tesla that theoatmeal.com did. You’d really love it!

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