I’m probably one of the few people who actually take pleasure in being angry. There’s some kind of magic that happens when I let the spark turn into a fire and just watch everything burn inside. Of course, if I let it go on for too long and just let it sit there, it turns rancid and feels awful. It takes around a few hours without a proper release for that to happen. If I use it immediately though, like in a workout for example, then it’s pretty nice. It’s like I’m accessing a side that’s a more original part of human nature.
I prefer love over anger though. The gentle warmth is generally more pleasant than the all-out inflammation I get from anger. Usually I get these fuzzy feelings from pleasant memories I’ve had with the opposite sex. They really are nice, I’ll probably end up writing more of them sometime. My When I Learned Courage short story involves two of those kinds of memories, you should definitely check it out!
It’s funny to me as to how much influence the ladies have had over my emotional growth. This year was a true turning point and I used my inspiration to make myself a generally better friend. I thus felt like I’m actually doing something for people.
My bros haven’t done so much in the emotional department for me; the bros mostly have provided athletic inspiration for me. Overall, the ladies are better for me for talking about feels. Because you know, feelings are “gay” unless you talk about them with a more sensitive individual. Ladies probably understand them more probably because they have so many of them. I always thought that testosterone had two feels: anger and lust. Estrogen has all the rest. This observation is probably proven by that “time of month.”
The devil’s trade-off in order to get this kind of confidant however, is that I have to witness more emotional outpouring from the ladies, since I’ve earned their trust. It’s pretty funny when they say, “Sorry, I talked way too much,” after the paragraphs of feels they may have sent me. 1) It’s too late at that point, 2) I’m their friend, so it’s okay, and 3) I understand that they’re a girl, so of course they talk too much about feelings. 😉
I think that this was my mind-dump of the day. I’ll certainly take a more focused approach next time. Definitely let me know what you think about the covered topics in the comments section! I’d definitely love some feedback. I’m also welcome to writing prompts as well.